Insomniac Enix
by CommanderRatchet57
Summary: Ratchet meets Organization XIII. Don't read if you have never played KH2.


Disclaimer: I do not own Insomniac, Ratchet and Clank, KH2, or Square Enix.

It was a typical day at Organization XIII's headquarters. Xemnas was talking to Saix about Kingdom Hearts and other crap like that. Marluxia was in his garden, watering his flowers,  
until Demyx came over and stomped on all of them. Zexion was reading his book, Lexaeus was trying to strike up conversation with Xaldin, and Vexen was working on an experiment that he would not tell anyone about. Axel and Roxas were talking together, and Larxene stayed alone, probably wondering what to do to torment everyone next. They were all minding their own business until the front door was open, or rather blown open.

"Luxord, Demyx! Go check it out!" yelled Xemnas.

"Why me?!" Demyx whined as he went with Luxord to see a rather weird sight.

In the rubble of the broken door, was a furry creature with long yellow ears and orange stripes running across them. He looked at them with brilliant green eyes. They also noted that his clothes were tattered and ripped in several spots.

"Oh, my God. What is it?" asked Demyx.

"NO!! KELLY CLARKSEN!!" screamed Xigbar as he ran around the room, arms flailing.

"I am NOT Kelly Clarksen! Do I look like a woman to you?" asked Ratchet.

"Well what are you? A cat?" asked Luxord.

"Actually, he is a species known as a Lombax." said Clank as he appeared from the rubble.

"OOHH! It's a toaster! Toaster, make delicious toast!" said Demyx as he stuffed a piece of bread in Clank's mouth.

"Pbllt! I am not a toaster, but I would like some toast." said Clank.

"Look, if you could just help us get home, then we can go on a magic toast adventure." Ratchet said, making a face at how weird that sounded.

"You are on the World That Never Was. A place where we Nobodies live." Xemnas announced proudly.

"Whoa! Isn't that a little harsh to call yourself that? Doesn't it make you feel bad?" Ratchet asked.

"No. A Nobody is a creature that comes when a Heartless leaves an empty shell behind. Everyone in here is a Nobody except for you two, understand?" Xemnas said.

"Um... I lost you after no." said Ratchet.

"What are your names?" asked Luxord.

"Oh, sorry. I'm Ratchet and this is Clank."

Axel sniggered.

"What are you laughing at, sir?" asked Clank.

Your names! What kind of name is Clank and Ratchet?" Axel said barely containing his laughter.

"Well, what's your name?" Ratchet asked.

"Axel. Got it memorized?"

"What the heck was that!?" Ratchet laughed.

"What?" said Axel.

"Why did you ask me if I had it memorized?" Ratchet said.

"Look, it's not me, the author's the one writing this." Said Axel.

"I haven't even made an appearance...Hey! I'm in the story! WOOHOO!! By the way, is it bad that I find you extremely attractive?" asked Larxene referring to Ratchet.

"WHOA!! What is wrong with you? I'm an animal. Besides, I can find a much better woman than you. You seem a little... naggy and loud, and bossy... and you smell. Really bad. You smell like dog sweat and bad Chinese food." Ratchet explained.

"..."

"What? What did I say?" said Ratchet.

"Don't EVER call ME STINKY!!" yelled Larxene.

Xigbar and Ratchet fell on the floor, bursting out laughing.

"What's so funny?!"

"You said stinky!" said Xigbar, laughing so loud he could wake the dead.

"Moving on. You both have not met Lexaeus." said Lexaeus.

"Hey there." Ratchet said returning his attention to everyone else.

"..."

Hi! I am Clank and this is Ratchet."

"..."

"Hello in there!" Ratchet knocked on his head, only to be thrown across the room.

"I should have warned you. Silent but Deadly is what we use to describe him." said Larxene.

"Ow! My spine!" Ratchet screamed.

Okay, this is Xaldin."

Ratchet looked at him, and burst out laughing.

"What is so funny Ratchet?" asked Clank.

"What's up with his hair? He looks like Chewbacca! Hi Chewy!" Ratchet smiled and got right in his face... Big mistake.

"There's NOTHING WRONG WITH MY FACIAL HAIR OR DREADLOCKS!!"

"Okay okay. Don't hurt me." said Ratchet.

"Respect the sideburns!" said Xaldin.

"I'm Zexion."

"AAAAA!! Don't sneak up on me!" said Ratchet.

"Sorry, I sensed you."

"Heh?" asked Ratchet.

"I sensed you."

Like a dog??"

"I TOLD you people, I am not a dog." Zexion said.

"And you wonder why we call you Emo?" asked Xigbar.

"HE'S NOT EMO!!" yelled the author.

"Geez okay. He's not Emo." said Xigbar.

"Ratchet, are you as confused as I am?" asked Clank.

All done!" said Ratchet.

"With what?"

"A teleporter to get us out of this wacked out place."

"Well let us hurry before they notice we left." said Clank.

They used the teleporter, which everyone noticed.

"Where did they go?" asked Roxas.

"Oh crap! They teleported to that author chick who's been writing this." said Xigbar.

TELEPORTED IN A STRANGE LOCATION

"Clank, where are we?"

"Hey! Get out of my room!" yelled CommanderRatchet57.

"Why do you have my name in your name?"

"Because I like you. Is that a PROBLEM!!"

"Run away!" they teleported back in the story.

"Yeah, you better run!! Ahem.. Goodbye!" said CommanderRatchet57.

THE END? There might be a sequel, I don't know. 


End file.
